It’s lovely when Boris goes into bat on behalf of London with his own party’s cost-slashing fringe, but I’m not entirely sure his new tactic’s going to win many friends. The New Statesman (an odd enough place for Boris to be holding court, and indicative of a change in the PR weather over City Hall lately) reports:
We are going through a neo-Victorian age of transport investment – the Tube upgrades, the Thames Tideway tunnel – and my job as mayor is to keep blapping ministers between the eyes until they understand that it would be utter madness to cut infrastructure projects that will increase competitiveness
‘neo-Victorian’ is pushing it – the Tube was mostly Edwardian, extended by Keynesian counter-recessionary spending in the 30s, while the Tideway Tunnel is a giant sewer, as we pointed out when he mistakenly included it in his list of transport projects at State of London last year. However Twitter being what it is, the use of the word ‘blapping’ was what caught the public mind. From the Urban Dictionary:
Blap : The act of slapping someone across the face with your penis. They then become your property
I’m not sure that’ll convince George Osborne not to scrap Crossrail. Whipping the Mayoral member out and slapping the Chancellor with it until he surrenders isn’t generally recognised as sound municipal advocacy, but perhaps hanging around with Ian Clement poisoned the poor fellow’s mind.
Update: Dave has a similar post.
Update II: For some reason the image of Boris beating up the Shadow Cabinet with what he no doubt calls his membrum virile amuses Liberal Conspiracy, too
Tags: 5 Comments
5 responses so far ↓
Surely any interaction with Boris is akin to being slapped by an enormous cock?
[...] Tom at Boriswatch adds: ‘neo-Victorian’ is pushing it – the Tube was mostly Edwardian, extended by Keynesian counter-recessionary spending in the 30s, while the Tideway Tunnel is a giant sewer, as we pointed out when he mistakenly included it in his list of transport projects at State of London last year. [...]
It Boris being un fair towards londoners have to suffer from his Tranisport tax on oyster cards.
What’s this? Boris doesn’t check with his masters before making promises of spending when all parties have already elected to sharpen the knife – before the election is won?
Didn’t someone say that Boris’s mayorailty is a warm up for the Tory Government? If this is the case then we’re not only doomed but we’re doomed by a clown.
Could you imagine Boris’s inability to handle the figures at a national scale? We’re only pissing a few million quid up the wall on a ‘Boris bender’ – at a national level we simply don’t have the funds.
At least when we’re truly fucked I will be able to get my nob out and do some ‘blapping’ of my own on Boris’s face.
Urban dictionary – truly the best dictionary in the world.
Come on Boriswatch – things need to be commented on….
Check out Boris’s latest ’seal of diapproval’ for his estuary airport idea…
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/8545118.stm
…now remind us – how much was spent on the ‘feasability study’?